


Don't You Care?

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, LMAO, Light Angst, M/M, gays, i love them, tsukkiyama - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-19
Updated: 2016-11-19
Packaged: 2018-08-31 20:12:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8591944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Tsukishima Kei's never been one to open up, and Yamaguchi Tadashi has always been clinging to him. Perhaps things can change for the better for the two, even if neither of them can deal with emotions very well.





	

**Author's Note:**

> hi guys im back with MORE SIN and i actually used capitalization this time!! because i know it can be annoying lmao  
> so this took a while to write and i hope you enjoy and i will enjoy all constructive criticism that you have for me

"I don't care much for your attitude right now, Yamaguchi."

"You don't care much for anything," the dark-haired boy snapped back, thoroughly irritated by Tsukishima Kei's general apathy, his brief happiness and excitement vanishing at once.

Kei merely looked him over with his sharp golden eyes, and pulled his precious headphones on indifferently.

"I'm going this way," Tadashi stated, somewhat colder this time. "See you later, Tsukki."

-

Once he was home, Tadashi flopped onto his bed, staring at the ceiling. The stupid glow-in-the-dark plastic stars that he and Kei had pasted on so many years ago still hung there, irritating him again. He was Tadashi's best friend- yet he didn't share anything, and didn't even care! What kind of friend is that? Maybe he can talk to Sugawara tomorrow. He's the kind of person that'd understand and know how to help, right?

Tadashi wriggled under the covers, slightly saddened. Maybe it's not Kei that's the problem.

 -

The next day, practice seemed to drag on for longer than usual. Still practicing the only thing he was good at- serves- Tadashi focused as hard as he could, but Noya still received every single ball perfectly. His discouragement blocked out the "That last ball was really hard to get!" and the "You're definitely getting better, Yamaguchi!" and whatever other empty words Nishinoya came up with. As his teammates cleaned up the gym, he thought about what he could say to Sugawara.

When the balls were back in the equipment room and nearly everyone was gone, he approached Sugawara tentatively. He noticed Kei at the door, making his way out. The tall blonde glanced up, and made brief eye contact with him, but Tadashi looked away, gaze trained on Sugawara. He cleared his throat as Kei walked out. "Ah, Sugawara-senpai... can I ask you a question?"

Sugawara turned around, leaving his possessions on the ground. "What is it, Yamaguchi?" he said, gently.

Hesitating briefly, Tadashi began, "Well... I don't want to sound needy... or clingy, but... I don't know how to talk to Tsukki."

Sugawara nodded, seeming surprised. "Isn't he your best friend?" he interjected.

"That's exactly the problem," Tadashi explained. "I thought he was, but he doesn't share anything with me, and I can't either because if I do, he ignores it. He doesn't care, I think."

They were both sitting cross-legged now, the shiny floor squeaking as they moved.

"What did you share with him? Was it yesterday when you realized this?" he prodded gently.

"Well- yes, it was yesterday. I was just... I was telling him about how I was grateful I had a good friend, and I guess I was too excited or happy about it? And he told me he didn't care-"

"About how you feel?" he... grinned? Strange.

"About my 'attitude,'" he sulked, irritated now at both Kei and Sugawara. To his surprise, the gray-haired boy actually laughed. "I thought so," he chuckled.

"Thought what?" Tadashi said, trying not to let his irritation show. 

"Well... Tsukishima's just that type to get embarassed whenever things like feelings and love come up. But he doesn't get all stuttery and blushy- he just pretends not to care. He thinks it's the best way to deal with his confusion," he laughed.

Still confused, Tadashi then finally realized what he meant. He felt a hot blush showing on his freckled cheeks, and he stammered out, "A-what do you mean, 'love?' It's not like I-I have a  _ crush _  on Tsukki, I was just- just saying that-"

"Yamaguchi," Sugawara smiled, clearly amused at his embarassment. "Don't lie to yourself. You probably already realized this, didn't you?"

Tadashi thought carefully. It's true that Kei often shuts people out, especially when emotions come into play. And they do stick together, even if all he says is "shut up, Yamaguchi." They might not know how to talk to each other, but they're there for each other. At least, that's what he hopes. and when he's there, Tadashi admits, he does feel safer, and even happier... 

- 

"Tsukki?" 

The only response he got was a glance, so he assumed that was a signal to go on. Tadashi took in the details of the scenery, of their route back home. 

"You do care, don't you? About volleyball. About your friends." 

Kei kept on walking, as if he didn't hear anything, which wasn't true- his headphones aren't on, Tadashi observed. he pushed on, "You- I, ah... Tsukki, I know it's hard to open up, I guess. Remember when you stopped those bullies, in grade school? And after that, we-"

"Yamaguchi," he interrupted.

Tadashi fought the incredibly foolish urge to check for a pulse, to make sure his stuttering heart was still doing its job properly. 

Kei had actually turned around to face him, so they stood there, next to a tall hedge. They stood there, feet planted firmly onto the sloping sidewalk, and it felt like an eternity before he said, "Why do you care so much? About everything?"

It was a much easier question than the one he anticipated, so he answered with ease, even as those piercing eyes drilled straight into his soul. "Because when you care, everything has more value for you. You have something to stand for, so you aren't easily knocked down. And... caring is sorta just a natural thing to most people, I guess." He averted his gaze when he said  most. 

Kei looked as if he was about to reply. but then he turned around and continued walking again, and Tadashi followed, not entirely satisfied with how the conversation went. Although, he didn't know what questions he wanted answered, either.

-

At his desk, Kei looked up at the small dinosaur toys on his shelf. He vaguely remembered that Tadashi had bought them for his birthday. He pulled on his soundproof headphones- ah, how he loved these headphones. They blocked out everything except for his own mind.

Why was Tadashi acting so weirdly, lately? They never really talked about anything important, but ever since three nights ago, when he starting gushing about how happy he was, and whatever  feelings  he felt, Tadashi has really been puzzling him. 

Well- not really.

 Tsukishima Kei was smart. He knew that he went over the line he wasn't even previously aware of when he said, "I don't care much about your attitude, Yamaguchi." It was only to stop the uncomfortable rush of words, because really, Kei didn't want to hear about how  someone else  is making him feel happy and safe and  whatever . But...

Maybe he should apologize.

Kei sighed, absentmindedly turning a dinosaur over and over in his calloused hands. He shouldn't be overthinking the small things.

-

Tadashi heard a  _ ping _  from his desktop. As soon as he heard it, he leapt up from his bed and ran over, chest throbbing with anticipation.

 

** Hinata Shouyou **

_ -we have practice tmrw right?? _

 

He put his phone down, not even bothering to answer. Of course it wasn't Kei; he never starts the conversation first. After all, he-

 

_ping!_

 

Tadashi checked excitedly again.

 

** Tsukki Kei **

_ -Hey, Yamaguchi. Sorry about a few nights ago. _

 

Quickly as possible, he typed up a reply.

 

_ -Don't worry about it Tsukki! _

 

_ -I shouldn't have interrupted you. _

 

_ -No no it's fine _

 

_ -I'm sorry I'm not a good friend. I'l have to listen to you more often. _

 

This message was unexpected; Kei, apologizing- and not only that, offering to listen to his problems? He didn't know what to say. Slowly, carefully, he thought up a response.

 

_ -Why are you apologizing all of a sudden? And you're a good friend, ofc you are!! I've known you since grade school.. _

 

He hoped that it was sufficient, though he certainly didn't feel like it was. He didn't want to give away anything, but he didn't want to offend Kei either. Not receiving a reply disheartened him greatly, but he plugged his phone in for the night and went to bed. Hopefully, he and Kei will get along better tomorrow.

 -

At practice the next day, both boys did better than they did the last. The only thing Tadashi dreaded was the walk home, since it would be just the two of them, and it would probably be extremely awkward. But as their practice session came to a close and they packed up to go home, he noticed that Kei was acting as if nothing had ever happened. He didn't know if that was better, or worse, but they started their walk home together again. 

The silence between them was tense and awkward, but about ten minutes into the walk, Kei said, "So. What were you trying to say a few nights ago, Yamaguchi?"

 They walked together for a moment more before Tadashi replied, "Uh, there's just someone that makes me feel better. They make me feel safer, and... yeah," he ended, somewhat lamely. The words sounded better in his head.

"That's... good. It's good to have someone to talk to."

They continued in a largely uncomfortable and awkward silence before Kei said, "I'm sorry, Yamaguchi. I'm just not good at this, at people, a-"

"It's okay, Tsukki!" he interrupted. "I know you're that kind of person that doesn't know how to deal with feelings and you're confused and embarassed about them! Sugawara-senpai agrees t-" 

"You talked to Sugawara-san about me?" Kei cut across, stopping now. Icy cold dread flowed through Tadashi's veins.

"Uh, well, I was worried about you because you were, uh-" 

"Because what?" he demanded. "Because I was hurting your- your feelings?"

Tadashi felt his face burning. He looked at the ground. There were many weeds growing out of the cracks in the sidewalk, he noticed.

"I'm sorry, Yamaguchi."

Tadashi looked up tentatively. 

"I said I would listen to your problems, but I'm losing my cool again."

Tadashi pretended like he didn't hear. The weeds had pretty golden flowers. 

"That's... pretty pathetic of me, huh?"

He could hear that sarcastic smile by the way he said it, and when Tadashi looked up, he found not only the aforementioned smile, but, surprisingly, tears. Shining, translucent tears, threatening to spill over Kei's long lashes. Seeing him like this gave him the irrational urge to hug him, and protect him; as if Kei would want either.

"Tsukki, that's not pathetic... It's hard to deal with emotions and people. I would know. Come on, I'll walk to your house this time," he said, brushing past Kei and tugging on his wrist.

The rest of the walk was quiet, and Tadashi felt on edge. It couldn't have been more than ten more minutes, but it dragged on, and he feared that at any second, another conflict would arise. But none did, and they reached Kei's home. "Tsukki, are you sure you're going to be okay? You... seem dead on the inside." 

Kei glanced over at Tadashi, digging around his bag for his house keys. "Yeah, thanks for walking with me. You're a good friend. I'm sorry that I've never said so before," he said, somewhat quieter and more gentle than usual. He slipped the key into the hole and twisted, but before he entered the house, he turned around wrapped Tadashi up in a brief, unexpected, and comforting hug with his strong, steady arms. The gesture spoke of appreciation and gratuity and it filled him up with warmth and contentedness. "See you at school," they said at the same time, and the door closed in Tadashi's face. As soon as he heard the lock click, he felt the hot blush creeping across his cheeks again. He realized that he was grinning widely, like a love-struck idiot. 

- 

Friday's classes and practice passed by quickly in Tadashi's happiness. The walk home this time was much more comfortable, and even warm. Several quiet minutes into the walk, Tadashi began, "Tsukki?"

Kei didn't reply, but glanced over his shoulder, a signal to go on.

"Well, uh, you know..." 

"Spit it out, Yamaguchi."

Tadashi grinned at Kei's interest in the conversation. 

"You should know that you're a great friend to me and I'm glad you're here," he said, extremely quickly, his words dripping with joy and appreciation. 

Perhaps this sentiment was somewhat surprising, and maybe a little too straightforward and sweet, because he said, "...I don't care much for your attitude, Yamaguchi."

But he could hear that sarcastic smile and he could feel that lighthearted, teasing tone. Tadashi could see the relief almost radiating in waves off of his best friend's form, and he didn't think he could ever know ecstasy like this ever again as they walked together, the physical closeness between them lessened- if only for today.

"You really don't seem to care much for a lot of things, Tsukki," he laughed.


End file.
